Yetanotherfreakingbrit’s parody of this bit of PUMA dumbassery deserves its own front page post:
The Eightfold PUMA Path
1. When in doubt, shout “Women-lynching!”
2. Pretend to read. In particular, pretend to read the Stimulus proposals. It’s taking too long? Then just jump to your long-prepared conclusions and hit the Prowl button. While you’re at it, plagiarize whole screeds and graphics, then warp them to your own ends. Nobody reads that stuff at the top except to get a vague idea of what today’s hatefest is meant to be about anyway.
3. Collect grievances. If you can’t find any, make them up. When you complain about something on your grievance list, don’t use specific quotations or link to anything. You don’t want anyone to find out that you made the whole thing up. [No changes needed there.]
4. Charge people for posting pics of their pets on your blog. They may be cute, but there’s Murphy’s salary to pay.
5. Swear. If you’re jenniforhillary, this will usually pass without comment, and on occasion be greeted with widespread cheers. If you run a blog with a supposedly child-friendly rating, post comments by others criticizing genital mutilation out of context, then censor them, then castigate the original poster for being evil for posting them on your site. Repeat, despite clarifications. Good shticks are hard to come by.
6. Outright abuse will lose you your five-star halo, so just tolerate or pretend never to have seen any indefensible comments from fellow PACers, even if you were posting on the same thread at the same time. Racial slurs are fine as long as they’re deleted for posterity.
7. Giving the appearance of thought is essential, but thought itself is dangerous, and must be censored if it gets out of hand. If you do think, blame an external agency – say, Rumproasters – for any cognitive dissonance you may be suffering.
8. If you can’t think of a good argument against someone, don’t bother responding. Use distraction, or respond offhandly to one relatively insignificant detail, then run away. Call it a dialog. Claim victory.
Please consider this an open thread.
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