Classic Riverdaughter

Since all the PUMAs are under their covers this weekend with their fingers in their ears screaming “LA LA I CAN”T HEAR OBAMA BEING INAUGURATED LA LA LA,” I thought it would be a good time to break out some classic PUMA.

As some of you know, before Riverdaughter founded her own house of crazy, she was goldberry (yes, she’s a huge Tolkien fan, and not in a cool way. More in a LARPer way) on Dailykos. I never ran across her in my own capacity as a user there, but looking back, I see that she was one of the more insufferable Clintonistas by the end of 2007.

But she wasn’t always that way! In fact, the only real constant in her writing seems to have been her smug sense of self satisfaction and woefully wrong prognosticating. Observe.

December 5th, 2006. Riverdaughter pens the diary “New Jersey Primary: If Hilary wins, she wins!” Yes, she spelled “Hillary” with one “l.” Despite the excitement, though, Riverdaughter claimed she wasn’t too thrilled about it.

So, whoever is going to take NJ and our many delegates is going to have to have more money than God. And it probably wouldn’t hurt to have plenty of name recognition in New York City. And only one person comes to mind…
Yes, folks, it’s Hilary.
I’m guessing that she and Corzine are buddies and that she has lots of friendlies in the NJ legislature.
The measure goes to the Assembly now where it is expected to pass. So, with one fell swoop, Hilary makes a grab for a small but dense (in more ways than one) state and surges ahead of Obama and Vilsack and .
I love the fact that this time NJ may actually count but I’m not liking who’s likely to win.

Emphasis mine. First of all, she spelled “Hillary” with only one “l” three times in the diary, and then several times in the comments. So it’s a bit of a stretch to imagine Riverdaughter as a particularly astute political observer or longtime fan of Hillary Clinton. Second, I love her certainty. This is before Obama started raising more money than God, and Hillary was still inevitable. How’d that work out again?

Next we have, from April 2nd, 2007, “NJ moves primary to 2/5; Hillary gets Governor’s endorsement. Grrr” At least by now Riverdaughter figured out how to spell Hillary’s name correctly. What I find funny here is Riverdaughter’s conspiracy radar going off early.

Don’t get me wrong. Hillary is on the right side of a lot of votes and if she showed more independence from her advisors and handlers, I could vote for her. But it is the sense of a somewhat sinister force behind her that disturbs me so much. It’s the same sense that I got when I saw George W. Bush being rammed down our throats.

There’s that “rammed down our throats language again. Paging Dr. Freud.

Riverdaughter’s entire sense of political reality is grounded in her abilty to sense sinister forces behind politicians. Did I mention she’s a big Tolkien fan? Isn’t one of the hallmarks of inisanity not being able to distinguish between fantasy and reality?

Check out this hillarious passage from that same diary.

Super Duper Tuesday is about to become Hillary’s finest hour. Yep, if NY and PA move their dates up, she could easily balance whoever wins CA. And even if the media market favors those candidates with more money than God(which she has right now), she could do a lot of retail politicking in this small, economically and culturally diverse state while being covered by the NYC and Philadelphia media markets. It’s a giant economy of scale and she will only have to do it once.

Now, if there are Kossacks out there that would like a real primary season, I suggest you start paying attention to NJ and do what you can to make sure it doesn’t turn out to be a coronation.
Come next March, I don’t want to have to come back and say “I told you so”.

Well, at least we didn’t have to listen to Riverdaughter saying “I told you so.” because that would have been really fucking annoying!

Fast forward to August 16th 2007. Riverdaughter posts some things to keep in mind for the updoming primary wars.

  • When a candidate does something progressive, don’t question their motives. I have been guilty of this myself. Assume they are sincere until proven otherwise. The last impression we want to leave the public with is that we don’t believe what our candidates are saying.
  • When they attack our candidate, never get defensive. Our guys (gal) are the white hats. Literally. There is nothing they have ever done in their lives that comes close to the evil that the Republican Radicals have perpetrated on the American public in the past decade. Always go on the offensive.
  • Consider the source. If the Broderites or neocons start making it look like our candidate is compromising his/her values and integrity, ask yourself who benefits from introducing doubt.
  • No one is “unelectable”. All that is required is that the candidate has more votes than the other guy. To neutralize the effect of game rigging, we are going to have to win by overwhelming numbers. And the only way that can happen is if we work our @$$es off during the general election. So, gird your loins and start practicing your canvassing techniques.

Boy, she sure followed her own advice I see.

If you wanted to be uncharitable, you might say she was just so smitten with Hillary that she lost her fucking mind when Hillary started going down, and started detecting “sinister forces” behind Obama. Or, if you wanted to be a little less charitable, you might conclude she was always a fucking idiot talking out of both sides of her mouth with an entirely undeserved sense of superiority and self-righteousness.

I’m feeling less charitable tonight.

6 Responses

  1. I’m feeling even less charitable than you.

    From my reading of Riverdaughter (and admittedly I only know her online persona), she took an enormous snit when dissed for her stances on Dailykos, and being blessed with a massive ego, everything else led on from there.

    It’s all just a hobby and a game for her. Shame her acolytes don’t take it with the same pinch of salt.

  2. I like to mess with her head.

  3. That…makes a lot of sense. Most of the real diehard Hillary people probably abandoned these jerks when Hillary herself did. And for damn sure their fanficcy vision of Dear Hillary bears little if any resemble to the actual woman/politician.

  4. “resemblance,” even.

  5. …orrrr…maybe, for some people who think like this, the very fact that she lost was sufficient proof that she was morally superior to the forces that supposedly were supposed to have been behind her. i.e. she broke free! but at what cost!

    …eh, doesn’t bear that much analysis, probably.

  6. […] the superdelegates until they tipped the scales for Hillary? And all this from the woman that wrote these things 2 years […]

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